"Trust: A Fundamental Requirement"

Monday, March 31, 2014

During All-School Mass today, the priest asked what would have happened in today's gospel if the official hadn't just believed Jesus's word that his daughter would be healed?  What if he had insisted that Jesus come to his home and lay His hands on her?

I realize the priest meant it as more of a rhetorical point but I imagine it would have been one of two things.  Jesus would have come, to help him in his imperfect faith, or Jesus would have said to go and see for himself that the deed had been done.  I think that's what would have happened because the official's trust was not misplaced.

It was not a magic spell or a test that saved his daughter's life.  It was God, reaching down, full of love and willing to lend a special sign.  The official didn't pass a test to save his daughter.  Then his trust would have been, in some ways, unfounded.  Jesus was worthy of that trust.  He wouldn't play games with the official's daughter's life.

I think Trust might be a better word than Certainty for what I've always been blessed to have -- through no accomplishment or virtue of my own but as a free gift that has always been present -- in my relationship with God.  But it can still be scary to act on trust, even when you feel it there.  Even when you feel certain and safe.  You feel foolish for your feelings, for your certainty that Someone has your back.  But it's there, when you have Trust.  You can turn around and head home, having come all that way and leaving without the prize.

If you have faith.

The reflection booklet asks if we are trustworthy.  I admit, I am a happily single woman.  You wouldn't believe how people hunt for bitterness or defeat or any of that insecurity nonsense in my voice when I say that statement out loud.  But what I want in my life someday is a partner who I can trust like I trust God -- not for any reason but because they have my back -- and I want to be worthy of that trust.