Saturday April 16, 2011

John 11:43-45

"Jesus cried out in a loud voice, 'Lazarus come out!' The dead man came out, tied hand and foot with burial bands, and his face was wrapped in a cloth. So Jesus said to them, 'Untie him and let him go.' Now many of the Jews who had come to Mary and seen what he had done began to believe in him."

It's interesting to me that here it's the Jews who came to Mary. Perhaps it's just a translation quirk, but more likely I think that John means the Jews who followed Mary when she just couldn't take it anymore and ran off leaving the house publicly to find Jesus. Because it says that Mary was followed, in a way that Martha wasn't. Thus Mary's declaration was public. She brought people with her when she went to declare her faith - and she did so less elaborately. She went to publicly ask for answers, to fall at Jesus' feet where she had felt so safe and loved and blessed, and say, "Lord if You had been here, my brother would not have died."

Martha's declaration was far more private, like the versions Peter does in the other three gospels.

I wonder if, in our society, we're more ready to question our faith publicly than to declare for it in a public forum. That might sound ridiculous with all the Christian posturing we see our political leaders doing to varying degrees of sincerity, but I think I talk about the Catholic Church's quirks more than I do the vital tenets of our faith - among my fellow Catholics and among those of other or no religion.

And I can't help thinking that in our rhetoric it's become too okay to default to "I don't know!" I just think of all the television programs or movies where the religious person glories in "not knowing" and thus it's "faith" - but I think that faith is knowing. Knowing even when it's hard. And yes, blessed are those who have not seen but believe. Blessed are those who know without having to have it proven to them over and over again.

Faith is too important. It's something that we should know. It's not something that we should fully understand or something that we should never question - because there's a huge difference between faith and a belief you've never questioned. But faith is something that we should be sure of. It's something that we should know. Something that we should depend on.

And I think it loops back, in ways, to some idea of an Eternal Fire Insurance Policy. Just in case God is real, I'll put in my attendance at Sunday Mass. But if you're waiting for the benefit of Sunday Mass, if you see it as accumulating a reward that you will have someday, then you are missing the point of Mass. Mass is a gift to us.

Faith is something you should know, that you should be sure of. Because when you are tested, you have to know that God will send the Holy Spirit to strengthen and protect you. You have to know what you believe, because there are trials and temptations everywhere and "I don't know" doesn't cut it anymore. The world is complex, and God is unfathomable, but if you are a person of faith, it's not because you don't know but still believe. It's because you know without having to wait for proof. Because if you believe, it means that you know. Not that you think it's probably the best choice so you will act as if it's true.

Like Life of Pi. If you've never read it, go out and buy it and skip this next paragraph. At the end of the book - see, I told you, skip this paragraph, it's so much better if you don't know this going in - at the end the main character backtracks the story we've been told and tells a different version of the events, one that is far less beautiful and poetic and magical but far more realistic and likely. And then he asks those who have been listening to him which they would rather believe. And they say they would rather believe in magic.

But that's not faith. I would rather believe in fairy tales and happy endings and a way to lower taxes and reduce the deficit at the same time. But I don't. I don't know if these things are impossible or universally untrue, but I don't believe in them. Because there is nothing in me that knows them to be true.

But I do know that God, the Father Almighty, is the Creator of heaven and earth and that Jesus Christ is His Son, Our Lord, Who was conceived by the Holy Spirit, born of the Virgin Mary, was crucified, died and was buried but rose on the third day and will come again. I know that the Holy Spirit is among us.

I don't have any more proof or perhaps too much more tangible reason to believe these things than the fairy tales above - but I do know them to be true. That's what makes faith.

At least, that's what I think.

Dear Lord, thank You for blessing me with my faith and our relationship throughout my life. Help me to always know that I can come to You. Always be with me, Lord, and with those who need You. Help all who need You to know that You are already there.